Nagmahal, Nasaktan, Nagblog!!! (hahaha)
We tend to experience different kind of love in different kind person we chose to love...Marami na po akong minahal.. and every break up feels like the first time.. masakit... nakakabaliw.. nakakababa ng pagkatao.. "masama ba ako?" "walang kwenta?" "di talaga meant mahalin????!" "landian lang?" o "meant tumandang dalaga?" sa lahat ng tanong na yan, at the end of the day, I'm still broken... Talo si Isip Ipis..
Back to Zero. Gigising na lang at wala na lahat ng kinagisnan mo.. Lahat ng makita, naalala xa.. Masakit ulit.. nakakabaliw.. nakakainis.. pero ganun talaga.. nakakapagod at di mo malalaman kung kelan ka makakalimot.
Di ko na siya mahal. Nasasaktan lang ako kasi I feel so betrayed by the people na pinagkatiwalaan ko :)
There's a time na pag nalaman mo na yung totoo, mag coconnect na lahat at mabibigyan ng linaw "KUNG BAKIT" and by that time, you will feel disappointed because you've been with a person na di mo alam kung minahal ka or nagpapanggap lang na mahal ka niya. Yes minahal ka nya.. NOON. pero there's a time yung transition ng KAYO at BREAK UP nyo.. Nung mga time na yun, pinagpalit ka na nya.. (sad)
Pag nagmahal ako, sobra.. Pag nasaktan, sobra din.. Pagnagalit, mas sobra. Kaya kung ano-anong masasakit na salita na lang sinabi ko just to ease the pain.. Aba! unfair.. ako lang ang masakit ang loob? Magmumukmok? Habang siya masaya na sa iba (haha). Pero after the words that I said, hindi parin ako masaya. Malungkot kasi kahit anong sabihin ko, di ko parin mababago yung katotohanang PINAGPALIT ako :) Ang bitter!!!!! haha pero it's part.. Okay lang maging bitter at sumama ang loob.. Meaning minahal ko kasi xa ng walang reserba at totoong-totoo. Nilet go ko na xa and I know he's much happier now :) me? happy rin and contented..
There are some regrets... mga what ifs... what if I stayed with that man who made me feel special before my ex came to my life? Masaya ba kami sana ngayon? May anak na siguro ako sakanya ngayon.. haha (JOKE!) pero kidding aside..wasted time with the wrong one is a missed opportunity to be with the right one. If you're reading this (my special man before you, ex), I want to say sorry... Sorry for leaving you and reaching out again when I failed.. I'm sorry... for letting you hear all my sorrows and absorbing all the pain... Yet I want you to live your life and don't mind me... di mo ako responsibilidad... Thank you... for being there in my toughest days... for all the advice.. haha.. expert ka jan ;) THANK YOU sa lahat :) If the time is right and we feel right about each other I hope we can make it too.. but if not, you will always be my human diary :) my best hug and smirnoff buddy (kahit pinapanood mo lang ako).
I need to forgive myself from loving the wrong person. Now I'm hoping the best for them and the best for me :) Anyways I'm so much blessed with my family, friends and in my career.. Tama na muna yun :) The right man will come and stay. Period! haha..
